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[agnominal]

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[lovernotafighter]

It's because you're a virgin, isn't it?

[Look, that's the normal excuse, okay? Plus people talk more when they're protesting.]

[agnominal]

Did Washington put you up to this?

[ Because if so, they are going to have words. ]

[lovernotafighter]

Since when do I follow Wash's orders?

[Psssh.

Virgin or the shy trope, and you don't strike me as fucking shy, Locus.

[agnominal]

Neither. He wishes to remain friends and I am respecting that fact.

[ New concept, Tucker. Now will you please leave him alone about this? ]

[lovernotafighter]

So, like, "Friends with Benefits" type friends, or just "Hands Above The Waist" friends?

[No. No, he won't.]

[agnominal]

I believe the term he used was 'bros'.

[lovernotafighter]

Oooouch. Next he'll be asking you to wingman for him.

[agnominal]

The matter does not need to be addressed. I understand his reasons well enough.

Having friends itself is something of a novel concept.

[lovernotafighter]

Definite upgrade from your last friend, that's for sure. [Not that one could get much worst than that trainwreck.]

What's his reason?

[agnominal]

Private.

[lovernotafighter]

[He didn't push it. Bet that was surprising, wasn't it?]

So, are you just going to make moon eyes at him forever then? Because it's a little pathetic.

[Hahahaha as if he had room to talk.]

[agnominal]

[ A little surprising, yes. But a pleasant surprise. It earns Tucker a little goodwill as he starts in on another front. ]

What I feel will pass. It is irrelevant.

[lovernotafighter]

[Surprisingly, sometimes Tucker knows when to drop something.]

Rebounds tend to help. One night stand and you'll be good.

[agnominal]

Doubtful.

[ It doesn't always work that way, Tucker. ]

[lovernotafighter]

Suit yourself.

[Because he's not pushing that either. As long as he didn't cope by wiping out entire planets, Tucker wasn't too worried about his personal strategies.]

I'll say this, though: at least you've got decent taste.

[Freelancers were hot, just also full of drama.]

[agnominal]

It was not intentional.

[ Obviously. Freelancers and drama do have a way of going hand in hand, don't they. ]

[lovernotafighter]

Dude, serious? It's okay to admit that you've got a thing for Freelancers.

[Fucking tell him about it.]

[agnominal]

And you are not projecting, I'm certain.

[lovernotafighter]

Do I look like a movie theater to you? I'm not projecting.

And don't try to turn this around on me. I'm the king of that shit.

[agnominal]

So you keep saying.

Hn.

What would you do, in my stead?

[ Maybe he can get some pointers to utter ignore/avoid doing, who knows. ]

[lovernotafighter]

There's a lot of good-looking people in good-looking shape around. If you can't have one, I'm sure you can have someone else.

[God, why did you even ask him, Locus?]

Besides, maybe he'll get jealous and get rid of that whole Bro shit. Or maybe you just get laid. Either way, sounds like a win-win to me.

[agnominal]

[ Specifically to do the opposite of what he suggests. ]

Hn.

[lovernotafighter]

[That's usually for the best.]

Hey, they don't call me 'Professor Fuck' for nothing.

[You're the only one who calls yourself that, Tucker. And this conversation here? Was a great example why.]

[agnominal]

Do they.

[ He highly doubts that. Can you hear the doubt in his voice, Tucker? ]

[lovernotafighter]

[Yes, and just as he does when Wash gets that very same tone, he easily ignores it.]

Damn right they do. I would write books on this stuff if I wasn't so busy with all the ladies.

[No. No, he's not doing that, either.]